Scripture is clear that the Lord designed men to lead. They are called to be the heads of their families (1 Corinthians 11:3; Ephesians 5:22–24). They are given the leadership of the church (1 Timothy 2:11–14; 3:1–2). They are expected to fill positions of leadership in a society (Exodus 18:21; Deuteronomy 17:14–17; Isaiah 3:12). - John MacArthur
Let’s face it, sometimes it is just awkward to have spiritual conversations with your spouse, kids, girlfriend, co-worker, etc. For years, I struggled with leading my family in any type of spiritual growth or even walking through a Bible study with my wife. It never came naturally. Then, when I finally mustered up enough strength to give it a shot it was always weird because it was something that my family had not experienced or seen their father, or husband do before, and truth be told I was not very good at it. Most men typically struggle when it comes to spiritual leadership. We all have different strengths when it comes to leading, but the thing I find most interesting is we are all called to the same leadership roles within our families. We are not to sit on the sideline and wait for our kids to ask questions. We are not to neglect the conversations with our spouse. We are to be active and striving after the characteristics that make a godly leader.
I always thought that in order for me to be the leader it meant I needed to teach. Allow me to say this method rarely ever works and I don’t really recommend it. Mainly because no one (especially your spouse) likes to be talked at, but would rather be talked to. Leadership in your home does not mean that you have the final say, heck, it doesn't even mean that you have the answer. It simply means that you are guiding your family to look toward Christ and the scriptures through everyday life.
Another way I thought leadership HAD TO BE was structured. If we did not have our set family time devotional, on our set days, where everyone is receiving and absorbing the gospel then I was failing at my job as the leader. Far too often, we as men will put on the burden of a task that is impossible and then get upset with ourselves when we cannot accomplish the impossible task. Our calling to be a Godly leader has nothing to do with structured Bible readings and making sure our kids hear every word of the Scripture and know why it is distinctly important. Life is crazy busy at times. If you’re in a similar life stage as me you might find yourself throwing another chicken nugget to the kids in the backseat while rushing to the next sports practice, while simultaneously trying to keep your cool driving in rush hour traffic, all while trying not to say a bad word when some guy cuts you off. My point is this, Godly leadership at times has defined structure, but it also can be found in everyday mundane moments. When we are driving and my kid says his favorite color is blue, there is an opportunity to respond and say “Yeah, blue is awesome. How cool is God that he gave us colors to see and experience? How cool is it that God created the color blue?” Pointing life back towards the creator and helping our families see God in the big and the small is where leadership begins.
I touched on it earlier, but lastly I want to address the awkwardness of beginning to fulfill our calling as leaders. Anytime something is new there is a learning curve. Sometimes it is still awkward to go to bed and lay there next to my wife and pray together. Some days are long and when I get home from work it is not easy to open the Bible and read as a family at dinner. Sometimes the kids are crazy and trying to read together is just not in the cards. But I will finish with this: We are not called to leadership perfection, nor are we called to have all the answers. We are called to lead with the promise that the Spirit will be with us. Whether this is something new or you have been doing it for years, I encourage you with scripture to not become weary in well-doing. Rest in the promises of Christ and have grace with yourself as you continue to walk into this calling the Lord has for your life.
Written By: Jordan Hampton
